Toilet Paper Panic: Understanding the Pandemic's Impact & Alternatives

Coronavirus isn't a hurricane, and yet American shoppers are hoarding toilet paper, bottled water, and other weather event necessities like the big one is due any day now. You may have seen the wry memes or distraught bulk shoppers, but you'd never know that for most of the people affected by this global pandemic, TP isn't high on their shopping lists.

If you're also looking to cut down on things to worry about, it might be time to leave flimsy flushables behind. In lots of cultures around the world, you'd simply save money and your pipes with a bidet. Sure, talking about bathroom business is always a little hilarious, but even American converts to the bidet lifestyle swear almost immediately that they'll never go back to paper squares.

If you've been too embarrassed to learn the basics, a bidet is a discreet little fountain hitched to the back of your toilet seat. You essentially just wash yourself, just like you'd wash your hands (wash your hands!!!), after you're finished on the toilet. It comes in a variety of tiers, from simple stream to heated seat and water, but the best part is that if you're bidet-curious, you can order a basic clip-on version for about $20. You may still want toilet paper or a frequently changed cloth for drying off, but you should find you're going through a lot less even so.

It might feel a bit like that scene from Demolition Man at first — or you might realize it's what you've been missing in life all along.